Saturday, October 1, 2011

Dark Souls - Digital S&M



I played a bit of Demons Souls and watched ubercrunch play through it on his PS3. It was one of the more painful experiences Ive ever had watching someone else play a game, and playing it myself wasnt exactly what I would call fun. The game didnt just kill you. It kicked you in the balls, spat on your face, and mocked you while wept. Apparently, the sequel Dark Souls, not only mocks you while you are weeping, it vivisects you with a rusty screwdriver, lets the vultures finish off your entrails, then rapes your corpse repeatedly and films it for your family to watch.

Its not just the difficulty, but the way the entire game is presented. It is sadistic by design. It is designed to break you mentally. The official IGN review refers FROM Software's unnatural desire to unleash the player into "harrowing spirals of despondency and self-pity." One hit kills. Permanent item loss. Curse effects which stack repeatedly - enough to ruin a gamesave. To say the least, the game isnt for everyone.

Apparently, its also a masterpiece for those who are brave enough to spend the requisite 60-100 hours of grinding and thousands of deaths necessary to reach the finish. As you might have guessed, I wont be one of those players. To those who will attempt the journey, I salute you.

You sick, sick masochistic fuckers.

10 comments:

md said...

I'll be choosing Skyrim over this, not because it's the better game, but because I'm a big pussy.

Also Chronic, your blog header seems to have disappeared and I no longer have the original image. Might have to make a new one...

md said...

yeah, the header url from image shack is no longer valid. I pulled an old one for now and put it up...

Chronic said...

I had the header backed up on my laptop, no worries.

Skyrim and Dark Souls look great but I will be playing The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword, which will be the swansong for the Nintendo Wii.

That, Uncharted 3, Battlefield 3 (PC) and Star Wars: The Old Republic are the only games Im 100% certain Im buying this year.

Im definitely going to play a lot of Gears 3 also, as I feel we have only scratched the surface on that game. Unfortunately my stint in multiplayer didnt start out very well as although my connection to the ranked servers is very good, the average ranked team is MUCH more skilled and well organized than the average team in Gears 2. But Im ready to give it some more time and shake the rust off.

Either way, Horde and Beast mode will be a blast and I see myself playing the campaign at least 4-5 times through.

md said...

i would like battlefield on PC, but i'm running XP :(

Chronic said...

Yeah, unfortunately Im on XP too but my friend got me an educational discount on Win7 so I have the update ready to go but it requires reinstalling everything. Been putting it off but its gonna have to happen soon.

My laptop has Win7 and thats what convinced me to do it for my desktop. Its not better and there are a few incompatibilities, but now some new music software and games are Win7 only so its forcing my hand...

Ubercrunch said...

Dear Chronic,

Many apologies for exposing you to the vicarious agony of watching me use the scrubbiest character class in Demon's Souls to play through the Tower of Latria, which must have taken me at least a thousand (two thousand?)tries. (Not to mention, forcing you to bear witness to my willfully irrational decision to forgo inviting other penitents to help me in my ordeal.) I'm sure the cut scene featuring the towel-headed monk still haunts your dreams, as it does mine.

Ever since that night when I finished the game, and texted you that I had at last become a Slayer of Demons, I've reflected on the fact that a friendship--no matter its foundation--can only withstand so much blatant imposition.

That said, you might want to avoid hanging out with me for awhile after I finish Skyrim, which is when I expect I'll turn my attention to Dark Souls. (Did I mention that I pre-ordered my copy a long time ago?)

I see you hunched over your computer with a perplexed expression on your face wondering why--for the love all things holy-- a modestly skilled gamer such as myself would be willing to subject himself to such North Korean-style drudgery.

After all, as the Eurogamer reviewer put it, "If Demon's Souls was purgatory, Dark Souls is a descent into hell. From Software's follow-up to its celebrated dark fantasy ordeal is even harder, even more remorseless and bleak."

What can I say in my defense? I like complex novels and philosophically-driven foreign films. And by extension, Dark Souls appeals to my fondness for esoterica. I second what the German poet Rilke once said, "trust in the difficult."

I sense that the above may strike you as a bunch of claptrap, but I hope that you will remember the many years of friendship that we've shared and excuse my dash of depravity.

Affectionately yours,
Ubercrunch

Chronic said...

If only every post and comment on my blog had so much thought and craft put into... it would be a much better blog.

Ubercrunch said...

You know, I wonder how many of the reviewers actually finished Dark Souls.If you guys haven't checked it out, the Edge review is impressively written.

Arups said...

Can't wait for that pixel by pixel descent into dark and impossible places. Oh, and apparently their quite serious about the 'no talking to humans' disabling of xbox live chat functions. Darth tried to skirt it and was summarily punished. Probably with death.

Darth said...

Lol, it didnt kill me but just abruptly ended the game saying I lost all progress and have to continue with last save...