Thursday, August 14, 2008

Bionic Commando Rearmed: Impressions

This is going to be tough to write without devolving into a sea of superlatives and drooling, gaping mouthed fanboy hype. So I will attempt to employ logic seeing as though all rational objectivity is impossible. Do you like action platforming video games? No? Stop reading right now, and go back to knitting, cleaning the lint out of your navel, or playing Halo, Call of Duty, Rainbow Six or whatever it is you entertain yourself with. Move along now. Nothing for you here.

If the answer happens to be yes, then stop what you are doing, reading this article, and download Bionic Commando Rearmed from XBLA or PSN and begin playing. The rest of this article cant convince you to buy something you dont want to play, because the genre isnt your bag. But if you think you might like to play it dont even bother reading, just download it and begin play.

Bionic Commando Rearmed is to videogame remakes what the Olympics Opening Ceremony in Beijing by film maker Zhang Yimou and choreographer Zhang Jigang was to performance art. Bigger, higher budget, more grand, more elaborate, more captivating, more opulent, more enchanting, and more perfectly executed and utterly flawless than anything you can ever remember. It just leaves you stunned and in awe. You wonder how many people were invloved and how much time it took to make it all happen as perfectly as it did, and you want to thank each and every one of them. Go watch the highlights of the opening pagentry and then go play Bionic Commando - they represent the absolute pinnacles of their respective fields.

I usually dont try to quantify these impressions, but in this case the game in question shatters the standard for dowloadable games and remakes.

Score: 10/10

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